Pornclerk.com

Buh dum CHING! LOL!

2010-03-15T20:34:54.959-07:00

Buh dum CHING! LOL!

My 10 year anniversary is coming up in June, I thi...

2010-03-07T14:11:39.563-08:00

My 10 year anniversary is coming up in June, I think I can be here forever. Though I'm not a "porn clerk". I'm a Self-Fulfillment Facilitator. There is a beauty in having, and deserving, the ultimate trust of a woman who didn't know me before she walked through my shop's font door.
The only time I feel dirty is when I catch myself looking down her shirt. (Luckily they never suspect girls who wear Sanrio.)

Totally. I do. We're a mess. I do love my clerks...

2010-03-04T09:59:47.825-08:00

Totally. I do. We're a mess. I do love my clerks just the way they are, but too much to leave them that way.

Its one of the only jobs where you can be yourself...

2010-02-27T22:28:33.519-08:00

Its one of the only jobs where you can be yourself. really. Like you dont have to pretend to not be as fucked up as you really are. Sometimes my work makes me feel like a scumbag, but like an ELITE scumbag. A pornclerk will understand that.

Holy shit, I cant believe this is real. Its like t...

2010-02-27T22:19:02.200-08:00

Holy shit, I cant believe this is real. Its like the first time I saw a copy of the "Gay trucker Classifieds." Just a moment of..oh I dont know, wonder. People masturbate to this stuff.

I like the word "misfitty" -- very suiting. :)

2010-02-23T16:58:30.797-08:00

I like the word "misfitty" -- very suiting. :)

ha. You're a smart cookie. I'd hire you and your...

2010-02-23T10:33:49.164-08:00

ha. You're a smart cookie. I'd hire you and your giant brain in a minute.

For what it's worth, I've been in school for well ...

2010-02-23T10:24:21.032-08:00

For what it's worth, I've been in school for well over half of my life, and am now about 2 years shy of earning my doctorate, and I still daydream about working in a porn store. Maybe it's because my local is so cool, maybe I would just be good at it,maybe I just want free porn... but the bottom line is, you should remember that every time you pine for another walk of life, a person living that life is likely pining for yours.

Thanks for posting this - I've been vaguely keepin...

2010-02-23T09:31:25.454-08:00

Thanks for posting this - I've been vaguely keeping track over the last few months (vaguely, because I don't understand legal jargon). I didn't care too much when Max Hardcore got put in jail, cos I figured he should be in jail anyway (not for obscenity though). I vote for getting rid of obscenity law altogether.

In the meantime, can I sue the makers of The Ugly Truth for fulfilling most of the Miller Test?

Another Fun one if you are a female clerk is to wa...

2010-02-21T19:22:13.446-08:00

Another Fun one if you are a female clerk is to wait until the store is pretty full, then duck down below the counter and yell out in your best little girl voice "DADDY!!??" Then listen to the sounds of necks snapping as the cruisers heads whip around trying to locate the source. The looks of horror and shame on their faces is priceless.

I loved what you wrote about him too, GGG. You ar...

2010-02-20T21:06:45.299-08:00

I loved what you wrote about him too, GGG. You are right, he was a very special man.

Word. I agree with all you said, except I think he...

2010-02-20T09:43:12.035-08:00

Word. I agree with all you said, except I think he has something that not even Gere/Pacino's lovechild could ever approach. There is something very special about Jamie that renders him...just *something else* altogether. Super sad.

That's what all the headlines are about?? That's s...

2010-02-17T11:34:41.986-08:00

That's what all the headlines are about?? That's so fucking lame.

But imagine all the interesting things he could ha...

2010-02-12T08:38:39.011-08:00

But imagine all the interesting things he could have looked at under a microscope had he just taken the time to swab some surfaces before he left... and, now he'll never get that chance.

I guess sometimes they do... like Glyndon said she...

2010-02-09T17:09:43.519-08:00

I guess sometimes they do... like Glyndon said she's had two-- in ten years. But that's what I mean, men DO feel it, but they generally act even though they're fearful. Nine out of ten car sitters are women. And 100% of them are Vaginas.

Oh Greg-- no that's where the story turns her in t...

2010-02-09T17:07:02.051-08:00

Oh Greg-- no that's where the story turns her in to an extra twat: Turns out she didn't really have HIV. She was just funnin! But don't worry, the odds are some day this whore will get it for real.

HAHAHAHAHA! Twitter My Shitter. Oh man. LOVES IT...

2010-02-09T17:03:59.902-08:00

HAHAHAHAHA! Twitter My Shitter. Oh man. LOVES IT. Catch Her in the Eye! Thank you thank you thank you for the laugh. Awesome.

Awesome. I like A Brutha Came in Your Mutha, but ...

2010-02-09T06:32:44.668-08:00

Awesome.

I like A Brutha Came in Your Mutha, but Francesca Le Has a Negro Problem is way better. I always like the simplistic and articulate titles.

My #1 favourite is Catch Her in the Eye, for its sheer genius. I also like the recent award-winning Twitter My Shitter, simply because I have no idea what that could mean.

That's 100% negligent. She should be arrested for...

2010-02-08T09:05:51.068-08:00

That's 100% negligent. She should be arrested for conspiracy to commit murder. Since she's given all those men a death sentence.

Missed you!

2010-02-05T18:18:38.321-08:00

Missed you!

Just discovered your site. Damn that's one sad but...

2010-01-30T12:41:35.114-08:00

Just discovered your site. Damn that's one sad but powerful blog entry, should be a Christmans classic.

i just read this in the magazine - love it. except...

2010-01-24T16:44:55.605-08:00

i just read this in the magazine - love it. except sometimes dudes sit in the car too. gender don't protect nobody from nothing.

I know it kinda kicks you in the gunt. That's gut...

2010-01-13T17:07:11.534-08:00

I know it kinda kicks you in the gunt. That's gut and cunt. Ouchy.

Good... effin'... lord. That's all I gotta say.

2010-01-13T09:02:16.858-08:00

Good... effin'... lord. That's all I gotta say.

hahaha... exactly. I love the lady newscaster loo...

2010-01-12T12:34:23.252-08:00

hahaha... exactly. I love the lady newscaster looks like she's cracking up. This is the dumbest story ever.