Pornclerk.com

make the name of your other site into a link!

2012-01-04T19:42:22.588-08:00

make the name of your other site into a link!

I can't stop laughing. You, girlfriend, have t...

2012-01-03T19:14:45.970-08:00

I can't stop laughing. You, girlfriend, have the greatest stories. I think I peed a little. Can't wait to catch one of your shows in Eugene again. Make it soon would ya!

TOM! I'd know you anywhere. Thank you!

2012-01-03T18:56:39.819-08:00

TOM! I'd know you anywhere. Thank you!

hahahaha! I had that happen once, his name is Jos...

2012-01-02T15:48:44.862-08:00

hahahaha! I had that happen once, his name is Joshua.

LOL fuckin a right we should. We all have stories...

2012-01-02T15:47:16.761-08:00

LOL fuckin a right we should. We all have stories... in fact, I do take submissions. This isn't just my voice on here, it's for all of us. If you want, just shoot me a story and I'll publish it here for you. Of course, it's understood I do not own your work as you're not being paid for it, but it is a high traffic blog and you will be properly credited. xo

NOPE. I strongly disagree. You're saying, I ...

2012-01-02T15:37:15.663-08:00

NOPE. I strongly disagree. You're saying, I should LIE to him? What for? He lied to me, that's what got us in the mess in the first place. I live my life telling the truth as much as I can. Lying over this isn't worth the compromise.

A well written, brave, and personal post. Mentione...

2011-12-27T18:14:04.438-08:00

A well written, brave, and personal post. Mentioned to you on the bus, you should get more into writing. There's a real niche for your style out there that people want. I'm going back to PCC Sylvian myself to get really good at writing and other things.

Hope you had a good Christmas Holiday Kristine. Havea great New Years!

Next time, just say, "I'm a comedian. Yo...

2011-12-18T21:27:15.848-08:00

Next time, just say, "I'm a comedian. You saw me do standup at a club." No need to embarrass the guy.

Wow. Mamu, thanks for sharing that. Oh, "An...

2011-12-18T13:41:01.210-08:00

Wow. Mamu, thanks for sharing that.

Oh, "Anon" mentioned something about a new site. Did I miss an announcement?

Any bastard comes NEAR my daughter, I will do anyt...

2011-12-12T21:36:47.208-08:00

Any bastard comes NEAR my daughter, I will do anything it takes to remove him from everyone's life... permanently. As far as this fuck goes: Karma, baby. WAY too late for a lot of people (you're probably not the only one he hurt), but Karma just the same. Love you, Levine.

Well written and sad. Fuck! I have a 4 year old da...

2011-12-12T20:37:37.579-08:00

Well written and sad. Fuck! I have a 4 year old daughter!

Thanks for sharing. Mine killed himself before I ...

2011-12-12T18:09:23.122-08:00

Thanks for sharing. Mine killed himself before I was old enough to confront the SOB (my own cousin). Took the easy way out if you ask me. I`m not brave enough to talk about it though. Maybe someday I`ll post on your new site.

I was dying inside, this was awesome and glorious,...

2011-10-03T01:44:01.639-07:00

I was dying inside, this was awesome and glorious, like looking at a painting of a sunset made totally out of poop. Fantastic.

F%@king Genius.

That's right. We KNOW your face! When we say d...

2011-09-19T23:27:48.231-07:00

That's right. We KNOW your face! When we say drop it, do it or you run the risk of being outed publicly!

I'll take that over "What toy would you r...

2011-09-19T15:29:42.964-07:00

I'll take that over "What toy would you recommend for someone who's been bleeding for six weeks straight?"

Ha!! Awesome story.

2011-09-17T14:02:13.388-07:00

Ha!! Awesome story.

You are such a fantastic storyteller. I really nee...

2011-09-17T11:58:16.321-07:00

You are such a fantastic storyteller. I really need to make the drive to Portland to see you on stage sometime soon.

(Followup on a different subject: I recently asked you a question on facebook regarding a hitachi magic wand. The price was a little too high, and I ended up getting a knock-off massager at rite-aid. Still, I wanted to thank you for getting back to me on the subject. I appreciate it.)

<3 you. We've never talked about it, but I ...

2011-09-04T17:01:51.230-07:00

<3 you. We've never talked about it, but I too grew up like this (sans the drinking mother) and had nights where we only had popcorn for dinner. Mom would watch while the restaurants she worked in just threw out gourmet food because they didn't want people bringing home food. Those fuckers will burn in a special place in hell.

I read the blog. I work in a porn store in SoCal (...

2011-08-26T02:28:37.334-07:00

I read the blog. I work in a porn store in SoCal (only one in our city, really.)

The stories we could all tell. We should make a comedy skit about it and go on tour.

It was pre-cum. I couldn't get off because I ...

2011-08-06T14:26:12.082-07:00

It was pre-cum. I couldn't get off because I was too afraid someone would walk off.

Nonetheless, your "wiping my dickmittens" on the cash was one of the most...touching...things a woman's ever done for my benefit.

CLARIFICATION TIME. 'My co-clerk didn't e...

2011-08-06T14:23:56.945-07:00

CLARIFICATION TIME.

'My co-clerk didn't even look up from his book, "Tell her to blow me."'

I wasn't reading. I was staring at our ceiling while stoned on weed. I loved staring at all that exposed insulation. It was pretty. If I was high on The Pot and staring at the ceiling while the Acid Jazz station was playing, you pretty much had me tranquilized.

And my words were, "Tell her to blow me or we'll 86 her." And I was joking, but you had to take it to the next level, forced to that point by my bitter, bitter blue balls.

' just laid it out there. "The guy at the counter needs a blow job. He's driving me batshit cause he's being such an asshole. You give him one for free and we don't kick you out. It's that simple, are you in?"'

You forgot the "We're not going to pay you, as that would be illegal, but we'd be willing to chip in $10 gas money just to help out."

Money they never got, as...

'"HEY!" I yelled, "Wallet, dummy. In case she rolls you while your pants are down." Never bring your wallet to a blowjob, everyone knows that. He nodded, handed me his wallet and down the hall he disappeared.'

Wasn't it my paranoid idea to leave the wallet with you?

Well, anyway, they never got the $10 because a)my wallet was with you, b) I didn't have that $10 because I WORKED AT A PORN STORE. And bless them, they didn't even ask for or haggle over it.

I have to repost this comment in an actual POST ho...

2011-07-31T19:47:45.403-07:00

I have to repost this comment in an actual POST honey, it's too awesome.

Yep I remember that fucking stupid thing. The Ton...

2011-07-31T19:36:26.850-07:00

Yep I remember that fucking stupid thing. The Tongue. So gross. Chad, sometimes I get on cal exotics or pipedream's facebook page and berate them for making dumb shit for us to sell. They always replay with a, "Kristine thanks for the colorful feedback!" FUCKING DIZZY CORPORATE REPTILES.

NO! I haven't done that one yet! My sweet lov...

2011-07-31T19:19:58.719-07:00

NO! I haven't done that one yet! My sweet love, won't you grace us with one little teensy? You tell the fake heart attack please oh please? Don't make me beg. (I'm already begging) I also want to tell the one about Stampy...

Get back to me Chad! xo

2011-07-31T19:17:26.412-07:00

Get back to me Chad! xo